Jews Love: Comedy and Not Chosen

It's been months since Jewbiquitous has mentioned Not Chosen and it's not because we had a falling out or because we don't still super duper *heart* him (I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth). Rather, Not Chosen quit his job and went on a four month blogging reprieve while working on his book, the publication of which we've been restlessly anticipating since his absence began.

What's the hold-up? Is there anything we can do to further your progress? Do you need editorial help, NC? Should we bug your publisher, clamoring for an advanced copy of your book?

And just a note on your most recent post, NC. Your uncle, while very prodigious with the advice (and likely with the best intentions), is wrong about a central point, and one that I think speaks most aptly to your work: comedy ("stimulate laughter and entertainment") is a good in and of itself and requires no further justification for it's production. Comedy is good. Surely, if you learned nothing else from the Jews, it's that if all else fails, you can always laugh at yourself. And others. Especially others.

Jews Love: Harry Potter

Except in Israel, which, as we all know by now, had some issues with the release date. You know, because it desecrated the holy sabbath.

I would like it to be known that I refrained from opening/reading my copy until the end of the holy sabbath. For reals, yo.

And now, the round-up (done quickly because I am super tired):

Jack liked the book, but didn't love it.

Pedant found it anti-climactic.

CK of Jewlicious reported on the Israel/release issue, and its coverage by Gawker (which I have been boycotting for a few months now, due to the increase in offensive content, and decrease in amusement value).

And, if only to make DK crazy, Rabbi Jack Abramowitz of NCSY has appropriated Harry Potter as a series that contains many Jewish values.

That last reminds me of a class I took in High School, it was "Biblical Themes in Film." Basically we watched a number of movies, and then the principal's wife (who served no other useful purpose in the school, as far as I can tell) stretched plot points and "symbols" to make them relevant to the New Testament.

Case in point: the movie Nell. Seriously? A woman who has lived alone in the woods after being raised by a woman with a stroke, and as a result cannot speak so well. What does this have to do with Christ? Nothing I could tell. Needless to say, I, and my other non-Christian classmate (Muhammed. No joke, that's his name.) objected to some of the theories. I did not do so awesomely in that class.

Apologies for the lack of Microsoft paint edited images of Harry Potter, but it's been done already. Both Jewschool and Jewlicious have images of Potter wearing a kippah, and anything more creative than that is really beyond me.

Jews Love: Pregnancy

Last night I saw Knocked Up with the upstairs neighbor. It was fun, I laughed. I totally agree with all of the criticisms that I've heard about it, mainly that:

1) Those who are pro-choice (pro-abortion) in the movie treat it as a "quick fix" and don't deal at all with the serious nature of the procedure, or the emotional toll it can have on a woman. However, it is an option, and after considering it the main character (Allison) chooses to have the baby, so I would say the movie is overall pro-choice, if occasionally a bit too flip about abortion.

and

2) Jewish boy meets/impregnates non-Jewish, blonde goddess (I don't like to use the s-word when referring to non-Jews, as it is pejorative). I know that Seth Rogan is Jewish, he is sort of nebbishy, a bit chubby, curly hair, a slacker (if intelligent) but did he have to PLAY a Jewish guy? Couldn't we have a nebbishy non-Jew?

This afternoon Harley and I, and another friend met for lunch and went to H&M. Nothing too exciting. As we are checking out, the woman behind the counter looks at me and says: "You know, our store at 34th street has a maternity section." I said thanks, and walked away. SERIOUSLY? Again? I know that I'm wearing a loose dress, but HEY, it's summer, and it is light and airy. WTF.

Harley comforted me by pointing out that I'm generally very slender, so wearing an empire waist dress makes me look pregnant, instead of fat. Ok, fine, whatever, I got over it.

I get back to my desk to see Heeb's THE KIDS ISSUE.

I am going to kill someone.

Jews Love: Music Videos

I discovered this by accident. It has actually changed my life:

Lip Gloss Song by Lil Mama

The message that "it wasn't the lipgloss, it was you all along" is probably my favorite part.

Another school-themed video: Pop, Lock, and Drop by Huey

I both love, and am disturbed by the teeny girl who does the "pop, lock, and drop it."

And a charming old-school video, courtesy of Slate: Aunt Jackie by Jason Fox

Jews Love: Restaurant Meme

I usually don't do these, but someone left Jacob DaJew in the lurch, so here goes:

Upper West Side, New York USA

List out your top 5 favorite places to eat at your location.

Ok, so I'm going to broadly interpret "your location" as Manhattan.

5) The sadly-defunct Makor

Kosher dairy, which was great for an early dinner, not too expensive, and really close to Lincoln Center. I guess now when I am going to the Met I'll have to eat at Levana. Which is really a much different experience.

4) Seamless Web: Not really a restaurant so much as a way to obtain food, amazing for lazy Sundays/ any day of the week that you want to sit at home and order in without ever talking to a human being. It would be even more awesome if you could order from Ali Baba.

3) Ali Baba: The best shwarma on the Upper West Side, which probably isn't saying much, but Ali Baba is great. It's at 84th and Amsterdam, and on weekends open until 3am. Unfortunately it's getting expensive ($12 for shwarma laffa, and $9.50 for shwarma pita), but unlike Chickpea the heksher* is ironclad. Also super-convenient for those of us on the UWS.

2)Chennai Garden: one of the (many) vegetarian Indian restaurants in the 27th and Lexington neighborhood, this one has a teudah* in the window so stringent, it's in Yiddish. Also the food is great, super-cheap, and I've never had trouble getting a table. The decor is fun too. Not so great for a date place, or anytime that you want a private conversation as the tables are really, really close together.

1) Buddha Bodai: my favorite Chinese restaurant. It's at the corner of Mott and Worth (on the edge of Chinatown), and I've actually had dinner there for $10/person including tip. For those who really love the standard Kosher Chinese food, this is not the place for you. It is traditional Buddhist Chinese, so no meat, and they use tofu to create fake meat. Their dimsum on Sunday mornings is amazing. You know that a Chinese place is good when a lot of the customers are Asian, or in this case, half Asian, half Jews.

And last, I know that it isn't a restaurant, but KosherNY is actually pretty great. I get email updates on kashrut news, and they list every restaurant that I've heard of, some I hadn't, and include information about the heksher. It's a better resource than any other list out there.

*A heksher is a certification of Kashrut, given by a Rabbi or group of Rabbis to a restaurant or product.

*Teudah literally means announcement, and is a poster or piece of paper in the window/door of a restaurant announcing it's kashrut, and whose supervision the restaurant is under.

Jews Love: Facebook's "Causes"

Granted, this is just anecdotal, but almost every "socially conscious" Jew I know (who has a facebook account) has added the application for "causes."

For instance, Dan Sieradski (one of the most socially conscious Jews that I can think of) has four: Jewish Funds for Justice, Jewish Council for Public Affairs, End the British Boycott of Israeli Academics, and Brit Tzedek v'Shalom. For the record, the available causes are not exclusively Jewish; IRC is represented, so is Save Darfur, and the list goes on.

According to the facebook "about" page "Donations to causes can benefit over a million registered 501(c)(3) nonprofits." The way it works is that a facebook member puts a/several causes on their profile page. They then recruit others to do the same, and also to donate money. Money is donated via credit card (you get an electronic receipt). 95% goes to the non-profit, 3.5% to the credit card company, and 1.5% to Project Agape, which provides support for the application. (More information at MYDD)

Allan Benamer of Non-Profit Tech Blog points out that being a part of facebook, in whatever capacity, is a huge business advantage. In this specific capacity, as the facilitator of "causes" they have the ability to leverage the entire charitable giving of the facebook membership through the site. There is currently no other non-profit alternative. Ahhri of Ari Says points out that this facebook application is the "ultimate in positive peer pressure."

And here is where my pessimistic critique comes in. At first I saw the causes application and was really excited by the possibilities. Non-profits can raise money directly from young people, get out their message, and create a coalition, all with very little/no overhead. They can take the raw numbers of people who have added the cause, and be able to say that the represent a certain constituency. Unfortunately what I've seen is that the causes, by and large, have just become an extension of the "groups" function. A statement of belief, with very little action.

For instance, the Human Rights Campaign has over 12,000 members, yet only $712 has been donated to date. From what I can see (I haven't added any applications, I don't want their creators to have access to my personal information) the numbers are the same across the causes. Many people join, some recruit friends, very few actually donate/raise any money.

It seems again that my generation has proved to be (so far) all talk and no action. Even when we bring the mountain very close, we can't manage to take (much) action.

Jews Love: Father's Day

To start off, I did in fact call my Father, gave him a present (via my Mom), and sent him an inappropriate e-card which he loved. However, as my Father is currently South of the Mason-Dixon line and I am not, I celebrated it in the traditional way. By going to an Idan Raichel concert with all of the other unloved children.

Jack posted Haveil Havelim #121, a Father's Day edition, which I really cannot top (obviously). Rabbi Eric Eisenkramer, the Fly Fishing Rabbi shares memories of, what else, fly fishing with his father. The post is charming, and almost makes me wish that I knew how to fish. Almost. SM Schwartz of Seattle Jew posts a picture of his father. It made me consider doing the same, so here is my microsoft paint version of my dad:

My Father is going to kill me if he sees this.

On a less serious note, PhunkyMonkey has a list of "Top Ten Things Overheard in Jewish History Re: Father's Day," which is cute and amusing. And also taken directly from Bangitout.com without attribution.

At any rate, I am tired of this post, so I hope that you all had a Happy Father's day.

Jews Love: Illegal Immigrants

Historically Jews have been immigrants. We've been expelled, and invited, and expelled, and invited, and expelled, and tolerated, for a long time. Maybe it's this long history, and the fact that a good portion of Jews worldwide (6 million or in America, and another 5 or 6 in Israel) are relatively new immigrants, that makes me extremely sympathetic to the plight of more recent immigrants.

Steven E. Landsburg has an article in Slate about the economic impact of immigration. Two years ago Mimi in New York wrote an article for the Village Voice on How To Become an Illegal Immigrant. Landsburg focuses on legal immigrants, but if you look at the economics alone, illegal immigrants* help our economy in numerable ways:

1) While NY Times claims that "affluent white families" are leading the baby boom, other sources (like the Immigration News Blog) point out that "The number of births to Mexican women increased 28 percent from 2000 to 2005, a time in which the city’s overall births were down." And we need to have a positive population growth rate. Despite issues in world overpopulation, societies that do not have positive growth rates are having a great deal of difficulty. Look at Japan (piece from UMW), for instance. Not enough doctors, an increasingly elderly-heavy society with few caregivers, and many other related issues.

2) There is a lot of talk about how illegal immigrants decrease wages by increasing competition. Thing is, a lot of the jobs they do are jobs that Americans don't want. In January of this year Daniel Gross wrote two pieces for Slate on jobs that Americans won't do. They include working as sailors on cargo ships, long-haul truckers, agricultural laborers, landscaping, entry-level construction, and the list goes on. Also, again, refer to Landsburg's article for a breakdown of how much impact they actually have on our society and earning power.

3) Myth: Immigrants take a lot of social services, and funding. Fact: Many illegal immigrants use stolen social security numbers at their place of work. This means that while they are paying payroll (and other) taxes, they don't get a refund. In many cases they cannot take advantage of Medicaid, Medicare, and other government entitlement programs, yet they contribute to the general coffers. An influx of immigrants, with their earning and tax potential, certainly helps move our stagnant social security system. Also: illegal immigrants are consumers, which means that they pay all regressive taxes, like sales tax, tolls, and more, once again contributing to systems whose services from which they disproportionately do not benefit.

4) Now I recognize that this point is pure rhetoric, but: we are a country based on immigration. Some of our greatest gains were made when our borders were either porous, or less restricted than they are now. With new immigrants come new blood, new ideas, and people with a hunger for success. Many American-born Americans have a sense of entitlement. We don't work as hard, aren't as ambitious, and, are generally spoiled. If we wish to continue our economic dominance we need to either regain the traits that made us great (hard work, entrepreneurship, etc) or we need to import people that have them.

Obviously there are some security and other concerns about opening our borders to illegal immigrants. I understand them. But right now for every immigrant who is caught at the border, two make it in. We clearly need to change our frame of reference, and while the new legislation granting amnesty is interesting, I think that it doesn't really address all of the issues.

* I have chosen to use the term "illegal immigrant" instead of "undocumented immigrant" because while a person can never be illegal, their immigration was, technically, outside the bounds of American law.

Jews Love: Shabbes Meals

According to some source (which I cannot find the name for, someone please help) that "more than the Jews having kept the Sabbath, the Sabbath has kept the Jews." Which I find interesting, but those type of comments tend to worry me. The reason being that when people say that Sabbath and Kashrut have preserved the Jewish people, what they are really saying is that separatism has preserved Jews as a people. And I find that kind of reasoning fairly worrying.

Jews also Love: Copyright Infringement

My friends and I use Shabbat as an opportunity for socializing, it is one of the few times that we can sit down, for a meal, and talk with no scheduled activities. To that end, I host a Shabbat meal almost every week. This week I held a (delicious) dairy Shabbat lunch and invited the usual cast of characters. As usual, there were some great quotes:

My cousin (talking about Johns Hopkins Lacrosse players): they've been good since they were three, and someone put a stick in one hand, and a crab cake in the other.

CJ's best friend (to my non-Jewish roommate): if we shared a faith, we'd be together. (silence) Assuming of course that you're attracted to me. (more silence)

The Roommate's Gentleman Caller: so is it worse if your significant other cheats on you with a guy, or with a girl? And either way, would you forgive them?

And that was just the beginning. I had forgotten why I like hosting Shabbat meals.

Jews Love: Jewcy, Again

Well, I have recommenced my on-again, off-again love affair with Jewcy. Here are the reasons why:

Tamar Fox's comment that: "I feel about atheists the way I feel about people who wear leggings. I disagree with their choices, but it doesn’t keep me up at night."

Peter Hyman's article on how the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Got [Him] Dumped. And then the comment moderator's reaction to the first (inappropriate) comment: [Comment removed, commenter speculated about anatomy of other site users without providing supporting evidence] And the charming exchange that resulted between Hyman, Joey Kurtzman, and another commenter.

I also really enjoyed Rebecca DiLiberto's article about discovering and wrestling with her "1/4" Jewish identity. Especially her musings about what she would have done in a situation like a terrorist hijacking. I think that as children we all fantasized about what we would have done in the Holocaust, Spanish Inquisiton, or if faced with a Neo-Nazi.

And last, but not least, Izzy Grinspan's deconstruction of "Knocked Up" a movie so good that The Onion's AV club gave it one of it's coveted A's.

In conclusion, Jewcy, we're back on. Want to go out for drinks sometime? CJ is out of town...

Jews Love: Shavuot

Actually, it is my least favorite holiday. I dislike staying up late, and it is traditional to stay up all night and learn Torah. Although I do love dairy products, the trend in recent years has been to reclaim meat for Shavuot*. Not so clear why. I love dairy products! They do not hurt my delicate stomach, and they mean a far better class of dessert. Also: we read the Book of Ruth, from which comes one of the most popular quotations read at weddings (your G-d is my G-d, wherever you go I will follow, etc, etc) which was actually said from one woman to another. Another strike for homosexuality in Judaism! I don't hate the Book of Ruth, I just find it kind of icky. It does, however, give us the best euphemism for sleeping with someone, "uncover[ing] his feet." Awesome.

If you want a good rundown of some of the most prevalent customs, and their bases, you should read this post by Angel of Woman Honor Thyself. If you want a more scholarly description, check out Rabbi Professor David Golinkin's piece for About.com. Yael of Olehgirl talks about her personal experience of Shavuot in Israel, and again I am reminded of how much more fun chagim* are in Israel. Judy of Jerusalem Diaries goes further to stoke my jealousy with her description of the thousands of people packing the streets of Jerusalem. Yehudit Bracha of Jewschool describes her Shavuot in Israel as "like a pub crawl, but with Torah." Amazing. She also repeats a portion of a lecture she attended about Jubilee years. The concept being that in every 7th year the land is allowed to lie fallow, and all debts are forgiven. Unfortunately what this meant in practice is that people did not lend to someone right before the Jubilee year, so people were growing hungry. No less a figure than Rabbi Hillel himself decided to abolish the practice of a Jubilee year, as it was causing a social ill, and not a social good.

This brings me back to a conversation I have had with Harley over and over again. We don't sell our children anymore to pay debts, and we don't celebrate the Jubilee year, nor do we keep a number of other practices that we consider to be "inapplicable." They've fallen away over the years for numerous reasons. Why can we not, then, discard some of our more distasteful current practices? For instance, the fact that homosexuality is "an abomination," or the laws that allow a civilly divorced man to remarry, but keep his wife chained to him? Why aren't those allowed to fall away too?

Ok, sorry, back to Shavuot. Other thoughts: Amiram Hayardeny of My China Experience talks about the holiday in terms of Jewish population and census taking. Although he does make one point that I disagree with about the Ultra-Orthodox community: "as they take on restrictions, more and more people leave." I don't actually think that, that is true. While the real number of people leaving Orthodoxy may have risen, percentage-wise they have, by far, the highest rate of youth retention. As the movement grows, the small percent who leave becomes a larger number, but I think that it would be false to say that the growing restrictions are mirrored in a growing defection rate. Another Jew abroad, Marc Watson, spent his Shavuot in Costa Rica, which apparently has a great museum of Jewish history, and, will wonders never cease, a kosher Burger King.

If you want to focus on food, By the Bay of Gluten-Free By the Bay has a recipe that, although I was doubtful, looks delicious in photos for "Reduced Fat Cheesy Baked Ziti." Elisheva Hannah Levin of Ragamuffin Studies created a Shavuot lesson that included a traditional festival meal (with source material from Joan Nathan) which had some delicious-looking homemade blintzes.

And a last Shavuot-related thought: Smooth Stone reminds us that the Torah was given at Mount Sinai, not just to Moses, but to the entire Jewish people, which is, as always, a beautiful thought.

*Shavuot is the Jewish Pentecost
* Chagim are Holydays

Jews Love: Street Food

Every day, when I walk to work I pass many hot dog stands. About 1/3 of them (this is not a scientific estimate) claim that the hot dogs are "kosher." They probably use Hebrew National Franks, which as some of you might know, was the subject of a scandal a few years back, had their hashgacha* revoked, and then got it back. So, as far as I can tell, the hot dogs are kosher now. Yet, as far as I can tell, people don't buy them off of the street (or from Yankee stadium, where there is a seperate hot dog stand).

I really want to eat from these. Always.

This is one of the reasons why I love Israel. There are many, but one of the silliest/most enjoyable is that I can eat their street food. Not only do I love shwarma, and falafel, but I can eat it almost everywhere in Israel. Off of the street. Now, this type of behavior amuses my family, but would horrify my maternal grandmother. When my mother and her sisters would eat street food she would say, with disgust "what are you, dogs, that you eat standing up in the middle of the street?"

It turns out that this is actually a religious statement. According to some commentator whose name I cannot recall, Jews are forbidden from eating while in the middle of the marketplace. Or something like that. Someone with more talmudic background than I have should probably look into that. At any rate, I'd really appreciate if someone could give me a heter* to eat from the stands that are specifically labeled as "kosher." I think that the OU should get on that. ASAP.

*Hashgacha: kosher certification, provided by one of several governing bodies, like the OU, the local Va'ad, or another similar organization.

*Heter: permission to do something that might otherwise be forbidden by rabbinic law. This permission is given by a rabbi, or group of rabbis.

Jews Love: Cinco De Mayo

I love Cinco de Mayo. Not only because I support Mexican Independence (they deserved it even more than the Americans, although I do have some issues with some of the top-down independence movements), but also because it is one of the few holidays that I, as an observant Jew, can take part in without feeling guilty. I mean, I guess that I could celebrate Guy Fawkes Day, or Bastille Day, but neither of those have the potential for guacamole or tequila. For the record, I do actually know the history of Cinco de Mayo, and am not just looking for an occasion to drink. I just happen to like theme parties.

As a result, I had a Cinco de Mayo Melave Malke*. I served tequila, coronas, nachos, bean dip, 4-layer dip, guacamole, and plain (blue) chips. Also, according to TJ Shroat of In the Pink Texas, most traditional Cinco de Mayo cakes come with a figurine of a (specific) Argentinian Jew on top due to a TV segment.

Kosher "Mexican" food. Cheese, but no meat here!

Leah of Accidentally Jewish celebrated Cinco de Mayo with "18 lbs of guacamole," but felt uncomfortable watching the fight, as it is a bloodsport. She said " don't care how big a match it is, it is a violent sport and aren't Jews supposed to abhore the sight of blood?" I'd never heard of that, but I'll make an effort to look it up now. Speaking of looking things up, according to Lindsay William-Ross of LAist (like Gothamist, but for LA). mangoes are the most popular fruit in the world, including with her Jewish grandmother. In the same vein Itai had a vaguely Mexican-themed Shabbat meal, but ran into what I consider the eternal dilemma: ethnic food that is not traditional Jewish (Ashkenaz OR Sephard) food doesn't tend to hold well over Shabbat, because really, who prepares something, and then needs it to sit/heat/reheat for 5-6 or 18 hours?

Of course, I am sure that many Jewish organizations used Cinco de Mayo as an opportunity to hold a singles' mixer (Lauren of Lost in Texas declined to go to one of them), and I guess that is cool, but let's just say that no one talked about the importance of endogamy at my party.

*Melave Malke means "accompanying the queen" and it is traditionally a party/celebration to escort out the "Shabbat Queen" (Shabbat is often personified as a queen). This type of party is popular in Chassidic circles, and is often comprised of drinking, snack foods, and stories about the rebbe. According to some sources Melave Malkes were started by King David, whose death was foretold to occur on a Shabbat, so at the end of every Shabbat he celebrated his continued existence.

Jews Love: Spiderman 3

For a number of reasons. I'll start with the most obvious:

According to JR Taylor of Right Wing Trash, director Sam Raimi is Jewish, and there are few things that Jews love more than to support other Jews in their financial endeavors. That was not meant to be quite as snarky as it sounded.

Because now that there are three movies out, we can have a chazakah* about spiderman. For instance, The Libertarian King has been to see every spiderman movie on the opening night. Now, for every spiderman movie ever (unless he specifically commented that he is not going to make a habit of it) he is obligated to go on the opening night.

And of course, Peter Parker, while supposedly not Jewish, is the ultimate nebby* guy. Debbie Schlussel makes the same comment that I did, that Parker cries way too much in the movie. But hey, that's how you know he's sensitive. He's also a math/science genius (focuses on his academics), takes good care of his only living relative, and is so damn broody. Despite his super-powers, Peter Parker is not a manly man.

Oooh, look at his scary spider kippah.

I could spout a few more traditional stereotypes about ashkenazi* men, but I think that I'll stop here, as you get the idea. And any more will have me sounding like I a) hate Jewish men, and b) am perpetuating anti-Semitic stereotypes. I hate doing that, so I'm going to move on to the last, but not least reason why Jews love Spiderman:

According to MyJewishLearning.com The original comicbook writers were Jewish. The industry was saturated with Jews in the 40's, 50's and 60's. For instance? Stan Lee was born Stanley Martin Leiber, and Jack Kirby was Jacob Kurtzburg. Several major comic book characters are heavily influenced by Jewish tradition, the most obvious of these being the X-man Magneto, who was a concentration camp survivor. NYC's Jewish Museum even had an exhibition on Masters of American Comics.

For all these reasons I'd have you go see Spiderman 3, but there is one reason that you really shouldn't. It isn't that good. 2 hours and 20 minutes of silly, bad dialogue (good fight scenes though), little character development, and random plot. However, if you want to see Topher Grace try to eat Tobey McGuire's head, then this is the movie for you.

*Chazakah: there is a belief that if you do the same thing three times in a row, then you are obligated to do it forever, because it has become your general practice. I don't think that this actually applies to Spiderman movies.

*Nebby is short for nebbish, a Yiddish word which has come to mean the equivalent of a "scrub."

*Ashkenazi Jews are Jews from Europe, generally Caucasian, and their practice of Judaism is the most widely recognized by non-Jews. There are a lot of problems with the hegemony of Ashenazi Jews, but that is a different issue for a different day.

Jews Love: Fitness

This post was inspired by one I read on Orthomom's blog. She mostly talks about the place (or lack thereof) for junk food in schools, however an anonymous commenter made the following statement which I found interesting:

I would like to see our Yeshivas (even the really frum ones! and even the girls!) have serious gym classes with certified Phys. Ed. teachers that show the kids how to stretch and to do daily exercises and to try different sports. Ban Dodgeball!!!

And then I remembered reading something, not so long ago, on Frumteens.com, about the immodesty of taking part in certain athletic behaviors in the sight of men, even while modestly dressed. I'm not going to talk about the unfair double-standard again, but instead how physical activity and fitness are not given the proper emphasis in the Jewish community. For the record, I understand that there are a lot of pressures in the modern world that did not previously exist. The double curriculum at Jewish Day Schools leaves little time for after school activities like sports, but that makes this issue all the more important. Traditionally, observant Jews have put more emphasis on scholastics than athletics, which has lead to stereotypes about what Jews look like, and their athletic abilities. I mean, just take a look at Not Chosen's old post about the JAP Workout.

If you want to talk about the history of Jews in sports, there is a lot to talk about, as shown by the book every boy I know received upon becoming a bar mitzvah (as I recall, one of the "sports" is chess). So there were not only Jewish boxers, but according to NNSeek, Jews were also some of the earliest diseminators of different sports throughout Europe. Not sure of the truth of that claim, but is sounds good. What the piece does mention is the concept of the "muscle Jew," which was popular around the turn of the 20th century in Jewish cultural, but not necessarily religious, circles.

Also: random historical fact: at one point, in certain places it the medieval world, Jewish women were considered especially beautiful, and Jewish men virile. I know this from a lecture I attended by a well-respected Jewish historian. Also Ivanhoe. Point being, with the American obesity crisis only getting worse, (American) Jews need to change how we think about fitness, its importance, its place in our community, and how we pass it on to our children. After all, it says in the Talmud (Kiddushin 82a) that of the four things a man is required to teach to his son, one is "how to swim."

Good Thing I Didn't Have Anything To Say

Because I've lost my voice. Unclear how. My throat feels remarkably scratchy and unpleasant, which kept me up last night, and gave me a chance to think.

You see, yesterday was Yom HaShoah, Holocaust Remembrance Day. It rained all day, which always makes me feel (a little bit melodramatically) as if the world is crying. I am one of those people who rarely cries in real life, but always at movies/books/country music songs. I find it difficult to read Holocaust literature for a number of reasons, the primary one being that I'll weep so intensely that it will be impossible to make out the words. For this reason, I often steer clear of Holocaust memorabilia. When I visited the new Yad v'Shem (Holocaust Memorial Museum) in Israel this summer I basically wept my way through. And then stood on the back veranda, looking out over the beautiful land that is Israel, and was struck with a deep, intense, and immediate desire to live there. That desire was only strengthened by my visit to the Herzl museum (hilarious, but not intentionally so), however, after my trip I returned to the US, to my then boyfriend, and a to life that would not easily make the inter-continental transition.

The love that I have for Israel, an intense, physical love, is only matched by my love for the Jewish people. I am one of those lame people who feels as if I (or a member of my family) has succeeded when a Jewish person does something noteworthy. I feel a connection to other Jews, all of those things that people of my parents generation felt, and those of mine supposedly don't.

And I wonder why. Why is it that people who come from homes where two Jews inmarried don't feel that inmarrying is important? I know that there have been studies done on how young Jews feel that being Jewish is only one identity among many, but that doesn't really answer my question. Why was it important enough to their parents? My Dad mentions that even though he interdated in high school he always knew that he had to marry Jewish. My Mom told me not to interdate, because it was unfair to the other person if I wasn't willing to intermarry.

As a result, post-high school I have dated only Jews. My elder brother has dated a mix, but thanks to my intervention is seeing (rather seriously) a Jewish girl (whom I like a lot independently of the match), but my younger brother hates Judaism. Guess which one of us went to a Jewish day school. If you guessed the Baby Brother, you are correct.

I guess what I am trying to say is, I wonder what was different in my parents' generation, what impetus did they feel that my generation by and large do not? I understand why my peers choose to interdate and intermarry, but not why my parents (who were not particularly observant or committed to Judaism in college) didn't. Chance? Or was there something else?

Jews Love: Israel, for real this time

Take my family, for instance. I went to Israel on a birthright trip the winter of my freshman year of college. At that time my parents joked that I should get a medal for "travelling in a war zone."Since then they've each been to Israel 3 times. Tomorrow today my Mom boards a plane for #4. Why? She decided that it was time to "get her act together" and learn Hebrew, so she's been going to Ulpan* with her sister.

My parents aren't the only ones who have fallen in love with Israel as adults. Jameel made aliyah as an adult (I think), many of the Jewlicious crew live in Israel, have lived there, or just straight up love it (especially the eminently crush-worthy Michael). Even with Mobius making yeridah* next month there is still a lot of love for the holyland in the j-blogosphere. For instance, the rather cute We Love Israel blog, dedicated to the uncomplicated, total slavish love for Israel. For the record, I do think that it is a really cute idea, and I wish that I could love Israel in that way: totally, unreservedly, and without conflict. Sadly my relationship with Israel is a little more fraught. Dvd Avins of Barking Iguana reposts a column from Daily Kos about how love of Israel is different than supporting the Iraq war, a contention with which I wholeheartedly agree.

Jews the world over love Israel. Ethiopian Jews love Israel (although it is questionable how many of the Beta Ethiopians still in Ethiopia are Jewish), Russian Jews (and many other random Russians) love Israel, and now INDIAN Jews! For the record, there have been Jews in India forever, there was a bustling Jewish community in Mumbai at one point, but that isn't what I'm talking about. These are "missing tribe" Indian Jews. People who didn't really know that they were Jewish until recently. And their mouthpiece, Dr. Navras Jaat Aafreedi loves Israel. That fascinated me. Dr. Aafreedi has his own eponomyous blog: Navras, which again, is fascinating.

If you love Israel, and you live in New York, you should maybe consider the JNF's Amazing Race, which takes place on April 22nd. It is a scavenger hunt/relay for teams of 5, with a grand prize of $500 gift certificate towards a trip to Israel for every participating team member. I'll be there. With bells on. Oh yeah, bells.

*Ulpanis an Israeli institution created to help teach immigrants Hebrew on a mass scale. The levels and teaching methods are standardized and have been taken on by many schools which teach Hebrew outside of Israel.

*Yeridah is Hebrew for "going down" and is the antonym of "aliyah" Hebrew for "going up" and colloquialism for immigrating to Israel.

Jews Love: Israel

Take my family, for instance. I went to Israel on a birthright trip the winter of my freshman year of college. At that time my parents joked that I should get a medal for "travelling in a war zone."

Since then they've each been to Israel 3 times. Tomorrow my Mom boards a plane for #4. Why? She decided that it was time to get her act together and learn Hebrew, so she's been going to Ulpan* with her sister.

I was going to write about Israel, which is always interesting, but Harley and I were chatting (as we are wont to do) and we discovered a new term. The "acquaintance zone." This is sort of like the dreaded "friend zone," which is when you like someone, but you've allowed yourself to become friends with them, and now they don't want to ruin it by dating you. This of course never happens to myself or to Harley because we are super-duper hot.

At any rate, the acquaintance zone, or AZ for short is when you are friends with someone, you like them, they are fun, etc etc etc, except that they are kind of a jerk. You might be friends with him/her, but they aren't really a good friend to you. For instance I have a friend from college, she is sweet, and fun, but really self-absorbed. I've never had a conversation with her where she listened to everything that I've had to say. Never. I have often held her hand when she's had problems, dropped everything for her, rearranged her life, you know, done "friend" things, but no reciprocity. She has now entered the AZ.

I've been streamlining my interpersonal relationships over the course of the last year. You see, I work 9-5ish. I tutor. I observe shabbat. I really don't have time to spend catering to people who cause me tzurres*, so I've been consigning them to the AZ.

No time to talk when my family member dies? AZ!
Cancels plans last minute? AZ!
Doesnt' call on birthday? AZ!
I don't like your boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other? AZ!

Ok, so that last one is sort of unfair, but really, he's awful. For the record, if you are in the AZ I probably still like you, and if you made an effort, we could be friends again, but I'm really not that nice of a person, and I'm tired of making the effort. Just letting you know.

Also: now I have that Auro-DRI crap in my ear in addition to the water. I am really going to make myself deaf.

*Ulpan is an Israeli institution created to help teach immigrants Hebrew on a mass scale. The levels and teaching methods are standardized and have been taken on by many schools which teach Hebrew outside of Israel.

*Tzurres is the ashkenazic Hebrew pronounciation for the word meaning heartache or pain.

Jews Love: Secular College

For the record, I didn't forget "Jews Love: St. Patrick's Day," but as the holiday took place on Shabbat, and I was nursing a red wine hangover from Shabbat dinner, I didn't feel particularly celebratory. Nor was there any green beer nearby. If you want a short summary of the REAL reason for Jews to love Saint Paddy's day, take a look at DaboysOf905, where JT has a good explanation.

Now, to get down to business. Secular Colleges. I went to one. Harley sort of did. I'm pretty sure that David Bogner of Treppenwitz did (and the navy too!), and he turned out alright. Although, apparently it was a near thing; Phoebe discusses (on Jewlicious) Shmuley Boteach's most recent rant in JPost, this time about how secular colleges, among other things "make kids dumber." For the record, I don't recall a "giant orgy filled with misogynistic men" although it might have made my freshman year more interesting. I should ask Michael and Chris (of Kosher Eucharist) though. They look like they had more fun at college. Maybe even a misogynistic orgy or two.

And another thing, as Phoebe points out, it doesn't look like religious/seminary universities are necessarily so much better. Certainly if you ask David Kelsey about his experience at YU, he wouldn't really recommend their environment as so conducive to learning. Or necessarily to focusing on academics. I know that back in the day, when my parents lived in the same neighborhood as Stern College, they used to see frum kids making out in doorways on Saturday nights. Maybe it's a different era now, but Shmuley is closer to my parents' age than to mine.

Yeah, I have some issues with the university system, and as I may have mentioned before, I think that High School should be 3 years long, with a year of mandatory national service afterwards (or optional catch-up time for students who need an extra year to compete required courses). I think that many students arrive at college without a real understanding of the opportunity which they are being given, and there are a lot of people who just need an extra year to grow up. Clearly I am an FDR-style democrat. But none of these is necessarily the fault of secular colleges. The institutions haven't really changed as much as the culture, and while the institutions are guilty of not adapting, that is all they are guilty of.

And in case you were worried that only the Orthodox are down on secular colleges, Conservative Apikores of Live "Frei" or Die! has an old post on how Jack Wertheimer (JTS provost) claims that "American college campuses [forbid] Jews -- or any other white ethnic, for that matter -- from "identifying" (whatever that means) with their ethnic group."

Yeah, I totally noticed that at college. I had a very difficult time identifying with my ethnic group. Right. Not.

Jews Love: Cats

Me: That's it, I'm moving to England!
CJ: Why?
Me: http://www.queenannecats.co.uk/
CJ: You know, the more time you spend indulging this crazy fetish [for toygers] the crazier you get.

As I may have mentioned before, I don't actually love cats. And with the exception of the graphic novel "The Rabbi's Cat" I have no information on other Jews loving cats. With the exception of one of my college roommates, who keeps adopting cats, despite being allergic to them.

However, after seeing this picture on Gawker, well, I knew that I had to investigate further into the seedy underbelly of the world of lolcats. From what I can tell, lolcats are pictures of cats in strange/funny positions with text superimposed over the top, providing a caption. A common form for this is "Im on UR----- doing -----." Example "Im in ur basketz, cuddlin ur bearz," accompanying a picture of a cat in a basket, cuddling with a bear. For whatever reason, these crack me up.

The definitive one appears to be lolcats.com, which is sadly under construction. There are some others though:

-I Can Has Cheezburger? which is basically hilarious, but more cumulatively than on an individual level
-The Funny Cat Page is moderately amusing, and along the same lines
-the Snopes string is hilarious, if only because people actually spend some time analyzing these
-Moggy is less funny than unremittingly cute. I have a friend who is obsessed with images of what she calls "cat in a glass." It is pretty self-explanatory, and she once submitted an image of same to demonstrate "things that make me happy" on an application. No joke.
-And for those "Whose homely face and bad complexion/Have caused all hope to disappear/Of ever winning man’s affection" Men and Cats

Hope you didn't have any work to do today.

Update: a few that I'd forgotten: Cats in Sinks, Stuff on My Cat, Cats that Look Like Hitler, and last but not least, that site where the kittens sing heavy metal (if anyone can find it, please send me a link).