Thursday, December 14, 2006

Not filler, but Filling

I haven't posted in what amounts in the blog world to years, so I thought I would give you junk food for thought as I worked on several deep and insightful posts (my apologies to TR).

First, in response to Annie's "Harley's A Liar" post: I am not a liar. Although Annie is, in fact, my wife, we are not legally married. I am not against partnership and I am all for freeing our language from their institutional constraints. I am appropriating "wife," just as Heeb appropriates, well, "Heeb."

Second, I am over formal shorts and leggings. Together or separate. I know you all think of me as cerebral and above the nitty-gritty of day to day fashion pettiness, but leggings and formal shorts hurt me on a philosophical, as well as a visceral, level. Why? They look terrible on all but the few people who can pull off anything. I am not one of those few people. They are only cute when worn ironically, and irony was so 2005. They are forbidden to most women of the tribe (at least the Ashkenaz ones) because we are (a) short and (b) really short. Seriously? This trend makes me look like a midget and I found out last night that I already qualify as one in Missouri.

Third, I love Christmas. Just putting that out there.

Now I'm going back to thinking deep thoughts. I know you're waiting with bated breath (yes, "bated," not "baited": google it.)


Benjamin J. Cooper said...

"Baited" breath is when you use Binaca.

AnnieGetYour said...

I will appropriate you. Oh, wait, if we had a Jewish wedding then I already did that. Cause I gave you something of value and declared you mine.

sherbs said...

Here here with the hatred for formal shorts and leggings. They just alwasy look bad. Someone I teach hebrew school with wore them on Tuesday with ballet flats that had fur instead of tassles. I nearly vomited....