First of all, check out Babble's bad parent section. It is pretty amusing, and I thought fitting given the amount of time I/we spend talking about the creation of Jewish babies.
On a totally different note, here is a conversation that I just had with a friend of mine (who for the sake of his job/social life would like to remain anonymous):
Me: It is not this cold in Virginia
Friend: That's a good thing. if it was as warm here as in Virginia I'd be concerned
Me: It is about 10 degrees warmer in VA, 40 instead of 30
Friend: Sounds about right
Me: Stupid New York, I wish that I owned dress pants [because they are warmer than skirts]
Friend: I'd tell you to buy, but then you'd have to pay sales tax and have another reason to blame NY, but Bloomberg is working on the sales tax for you, and Bush is working on the weather