My Father is Hilarious

So when I was younger I lived in a very wealthy, but small Jewish community. At one point there was a rabbi search, and my father was on the synagogue's board during that time. This rabbi search was incredibly acrimonious with awful things being said about all of the board members. We even knew of board member's bosses receiving faxes about them saying libelous things. Really awful.

So, first of all, my father wasn't harassed because of a comment that I made (at the age of 12 or so) suggesting that he might work for the CIA. He doesn't. And never has. And really doesn't appreciate it when you suggest that he does. Secondly, a family with whom we had been very close prior to the search cut off all relations with us. At one point while walking to shul, my mother wished the woman a "good shabbes" and she just ignored us. Awful, right?

Ok, flash forward 7 years (or so). That family's eldest son is working for my father's company, and moving to the community where my family currently lives. My father has (graciously) offered to house this young man until he can find an apartment, as the move does not come with a moving allowance. This guy will be living with my parents for the foreseeable future. And for the record, he isn't even the cute son that continued to hang out with us after the break.

Why is my father doing this? So that he can either a) force the mother to acknowledge him, or b) show her that he is the better person.

Amazing. And FYI, my father isn't a spy. For reals. Seriously, he is the least spy-like person ever, and not so good at secret-keeping. I bought my mom a birthday present and told him to hide it until I got home, he instead delivered the package directly to her.