So in a few hours, I will be traveling with Besheret to the motherland to visit with my childhood Rabbi who will be performing our wedding ceremony next summer. Whoa. Is it weird to be nervous about meeting with a woman you have known since Kindergarten and met with weekly through adolescence?
I guess, in a world where same sex marriages are by and large not sanctioned by the state/secular authorities, the only authority we can find for our union is in Reform Judaism (and I'm sure Reconstructionist and some Conservative folks). Plus she will be the first Rabbi with whom my fiance will discuss her conversion. And we seriously don't have time for Besheret to be turned away three times. I'm moving to the Midwest in two weeks! And lets be honest, who really likes riding the commuter rail?
Doing the "Jewish" thing in my life is so much more complicated than someone like my mother who ditched her Italian boyfriends for a "nice Jewish boy" like my dad, and then got married by Rabbi Whoever at the local Young Israel. If one more person asks me if same sex marriage is "legal" in NY, I might just scream. Or pout and shake my fist with purpose! When did the Jewish ritual stop being enough to be legitimate? mmm American pluralism.
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The last time I checked, most
heterosexual couples were not jumping up and down in anticipation of the tax breaks and legal benefits that come with getting hitched. Which brings me to wonder why everyone (mostly straight people) seems to be so very fixated on gay marriage being legal. The conservative right continues to say that marriage is a religious issue yet none of them seem to be giving up the rights they receive for being married and heterosexual. Practice what you preach. Also, since when does the government define happiness, love, and with whom you should spend your life? We should definitely take our pointers from all those government officials who marry and have affairs or sex with you boys in airport bathrooms. Good idea. -MT
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